Retirement Age Mess

There you go! Pension age to go to 70 by 2035....its official. But, hang on, the baby boomer bubble will just about be over by 2050. Why, because they will be dead! So altering the age won't make any difference to the budget "emergency" we are supposed to be suffering right now. By 2035 I'll be in my late 80's, if still around. The older children of baby boomers will be in their mid 60's. Sorry kids, you will need to keep working until you are at least 70 (just like you're dad will anyway). You guessed it. You've been Abbotted!

http://www.canberratimes.com.au/federal-politics/political-news/retirement-age-rise-to-70-by-2035-joe-hockey-announces-20140502-zr318.html

Even the Mighty Can Believe!

     BHP Billiton chief executive Marius Kloppers announced today that he favoured moving to a carbon tax regime as a means of placing a price on carbon. His announcement caused much consternation in both business and political circles, although it was supported by Professor Ross Garnaut. Some, however preferred the ostrich approach!


The Abbott frowned, then shook his head,

"What is that man doing?

He's sprouting forth about a carbon tax,

His reasoning suspect and seriously lax!"

The Abbott just sat there spewing!

King Brown perked up and looked around,

"I can't believe what I'm just hearing!

The BHP head is a greenie at heart

With a price on carbon he wants, now, to start!"

And King Brown commenced some stirring.

Election 2010 - V Day Minus 3! - Debate, Or Whatever, Done & Dusted!

The somewhat unexpected second forum, held in Brisbane, is over.  There is no doubt in this Battler's mind that both political leaders have run a gruelling race with dignity and courage.  Regardless of our political view, perhaps we should be thankful that we have leaders who have been so willing to give so much of themselves.

So, now they've had the final forum,

As the end approaches of this election race.

The leaders performing with defined decorum,

Acknowledging their public with style and grace.

Midst the hew and cry of electioneering,

They have stood above the baying crowd;

With respect from fickle foe and friends believing,

And party faithful standing proud.

We, not exposed to political fury,

Hold their fate, both judge and jury.

Election 2010 - V Day Minus 4! - Another Debate....

It would seem that another election debate is on its way.  Oh well....

Hooray! Another debate forthcoming

Or, at least, its on the cards.

More fuel for pencil and cartoonist skill,

More fun for cranky, part-time, bards.

Will we suffer just thirty minutes,

Or will we cop an hour?

Will it be a public hall discussion,

Or an economic punch-up, each the other to devour?

Bring it on folks, get it under way,

But be assured 'tis we, who have the final say!

Election 2010 - V Day Minus 5!

This is the first day of the final week and already we have seen the Labor official campaign launch, together with a bundle of new promises from the major parties.  It probably won't end here.

So quiet, the breaking of the dawn;

The people innocent of the coming storm

To chase them, screaming, from their beds,

Media blaring in their heads,

Newsprint all scattered on the lawn,

"Sssh! The kids are up. I shouldn't have sworn!"

And as the sun peaks over trees and sheds

The people await the policy dregs!

But this is the week that requires some thought

Lest our vote, uncaring, is cast for nought!

The Final Week Approaches

The final week of this 2010 election is almost upon us.  What will it bring?  More lack of vision, or perhaps........?

So, here we are, just a week to go,

Not a time for leaders to slacken or slow.

Its onward, upward, charge for the guns,

This week the winner must score all the runs!

The people shudder and squirm about,

Their voice unheard midst the tumult and shout.

Hopes for a future of visionary style

All fallen victim to political guile!

Yet, perhaps one ray of hope, moving forward, that fits,

Could it be fibre optics, the NBN and a hundred megabits?

Financial Skill or Smoke and Mirrors

The Opposition has declared its refusal to submit its policies for scrutiny by Treasury.  And so the argy-bargy continues............

Joe claims to know what he's about,
To keep control and run this place;
How to trim the fat and keep things lean,
Make things happen at a cracking pace!
Books kept well, have no doubt.

Then Joe and Tony meet with dread,
"Don't ever send those facts and figures
To Treasury, where I'm sure they'll leak.
Mum's the word, mate, lest revelation triggers
Misunderstandings that knock us dead!"

Live at Rooty Hill!

Wednesday night saw a return to traditional campaigning, when both Gillard and Abbott appeared at a town hall style meeting in Sydney's Western Suburbs. While nothing like a debate, reports suggest that Tony Abbott won the night.

Whoopy do and tooty fruity
The guys showed up at dear old Rooty,
Hill - that is - Western Suburbs, Sydney side!

No debate but a show nonetheless,
Put through their paces under stress,
By voters - undecided, that is - and paid!

Yet, after that do we really know
Who might be best to run the show?
And surely its true that when on stage
The best actor is the one after whom we rage!

Messaging - The Opposition Way

At the risk of making a blatantly political point, we now know why the Opposition has chosen to keep Australia in the technological dark ages.  Very simply, they do not understand the importance of the internet and the importance of download speed to its use and viability.  This became abundantly clear during Tony Abbott's interview on the 7.30 Report last night.

I saw a man upon a hill
Waving arms, he looked a dill.
Nearby, smoke puffed long and short
While pigeons flew, not just for sport!
Mirrors flashed, all bright and keen
As bonfires flared and yearned to be seen;
A runner speeding with message stick
Anything to send news quick!

Meanwhile, a little boy given cans and string
Could not figure out how to work the thing!

Oh Sweet Ecstasy - A Double Dose of Delicious Policy!

At long, long last both the Opposition and Government put forward a couple of policies that touched on areas slightly more important than the usual pork barrelling.  I have become so excited with this strange duel development, that I may need to present two offerings for your edification and enjoyment.

Prime Minister Gillard offered a commitment to fully implement the Murray-Darling Basin Authority's water plan to assist in restoring the health of that ailing river system.

Like a long brown snake it wanders,
From the mountains to the sea;
Slowly now, without much zest,
Not the beast it used to be.

Mighty red-gums stand in fearsome struggle
So desperate to survive,
While wetlands wither and recede
Perhaps too shattered to survive.

So now we'll buy the water back, the river to restore
And keep our fingers crossed, in hope, the people they'll not ignore!

____________________

Meanwhile, the Opposition, having previously stated their distaste for the Government's National Broadband Network, offered their alternative plan.  This was announced as "...more than $6b....".  In actual fact, it adds up to almost double at $11.8b.

Sadly for the Opposition, their Andrew Robb had a conversation on ABC's "AM" program (transcript here) many hours before their broadband policy announcement.  In part, it went like this...

"ANDREW ROBB: There is no confusion on our side of politics on this issue. We have got savings, fully costed and presented, at $28.5 billion and we have got expenditure of $25.5 billion fully costed and fully presented. 

That is a difference, over and above the costs and expenditure, of $3 billion.

LYNDAL CURTIS: And will that gap stay or are you going to commit to spending some more money during the remainder of the campaign?

ANDREW ROBB: We're committing to both spending some more- a little amount more money and also to identify more savings. So we'll give you the final figure long before the election."


That looks to me like a total spend on promises of $37.3b, which leaves a deficiency of a mere $8.8b above their stated savings.  Oh well, its only an election after all, and I wasn't very good at maths.


While I wasn't very good at maths
I could multiply and add,
Because of which I could "take away"
And at division I was quite dab.


Now,  Andrew made it very clear he had $3b left,
After adding in their savings and deducting what they spent.
This afternoon the bill went higher, for Internet you know,
Which leaves his promised surplus battered and badly dent.


So now twelve thousand workers are heading for the sack
And we get basic broadband, with the budget deficit back!

A Policy Bone To Chew, At Last!

Opposition Leader, Tony Abbott, today announced his $3.1 billion health plan.  Of course, many will recall Abbott's performance as Health Minister.

A policy, writ bold at last!
Abbott gives "Health" a blast!
From deep within the Liberal cavern
A plan, big ticket, for us to fathom.

The people, pulsating, paused with relief
Perhaps now, a chance to sharpen belief.

And as we study and search with glee
How the "Health" hiatus might be set free,
We might just recall a Minister for Health
Who dissected and diced his ministry by stealth!

For Colour, Perhaps A Dab of Brown!

     Today, we saw former Foreign Minister Alexander Downer quoted as running former PM Kevin Rudd as a double agent, and then deny it. We then saw PM Gillard get stuck into Liberals for their "disgraceful attack" on Rudd.  All this while Liberals accuse Labor of a dirt campaign against Opposition Leader Abbott (see "disgraceful attack" report).
     Meanwhile, the Greens got on with the election with Leader Bob Brown officially launching their campaign.

A little bit of innuendo
A little bit of spite,
A touch of "oh no, it wasn't me!"
"The quoting is not quite right."

A little bit of indignation
A little bit of "shock, horror"
A touch of "how dare you, sir"
But not a scrap of honour.

Policies hardly worth a crumpet, little to call profound;
Perhaps, if we're seeking green, we'll need to try some Brown.

White Australia & Pauline's Shadow

     "The Ethnic Communities Council of Australia says both Labor and the Coalition are fear-mongering and causing migrants to feel marginalised."


     One could be excused for thinking the current election is pandering to policies similar to those of Pauline Hanson, perhaps a resurrection of the White Australia Policy.


From a little town in Wales, she came
To lead us to election.
A pommy refugee by boat,
Practised, now, in political invention.


He was born in London Town
Of Aussie folks, overseas.
Educated at Sydney's best
While practising politics with ease.


Yet, together they seek the bigot's vote
While "White Australia" gets rewrote!  

The Great Debate - Done and Dusted

So, the great debate is finished

And, perhaps, we're not quite so diminished

For having viewed and quietly listened

To the Leaders, newly christened,

In the tradition of election-time debate.

Of course, adjudicators must surely comment

And words will flow a-torrent,

Midst the muddle and confusion all about;

Whilst we, quite humble, beset with raging doubt,

Raise a glass and humbly stumble, toward our fate!

The Great Debate - Almost

"Prime Minister Julia Gillard and Opposition Leader Tony Abbott will tonight go head-to-head in the only televised debate of the election campaign.

The hour-long debate will be held at the National Press Club in Canberra with both leaders facing questions from a panel journalists after making a short opening statement."  ABC News

The Great Debate is almost here,

No doubt to enhance electoral cheer.

Will it inform, or perhaps enlighten,

Or will it work to dull and frighten

A people poised to place a vote,

A people ready to choose, or smote

Those who rule and demand more taxes

While punching "porkies" by email and faxes,

And drive us up the bleedin' wall?

Ah, we wait, excited, for our leaders to enthral!

A Clunker Of An Idea

ABC News reports that Prime Minister, Julia Gillard, today announced plans to pay cash as an incentive for people to get rid of their old vehicles.

When making the announcement in Brisbane, Ms Gillard commented that "People will go to their car dealership they will negotiate, get the price that they can get for their new car, their rebate will be paid when their old car is scrapped," she said.

"The dealer will be responsible for doing that. We will have Aus Industry oversighting this."

They used to be called "rust buckets",

Now "clunker" is their name

And they are now, to one and all,

The new weapon in the climate game!

"If we get these clunkers off the road

And replaced with something new,

We'll reduce our carbon by huge amounts

(And boost new car sales, too!)."

And so, thus led by those without conviction,

We shuffle off toward extinction.

Gillard Climate Policy - Policy Free Zone

Prime Minister Gillard today announced her climate change policy for the forthcoming election.  I thought we were having an election to appoint our decision makers.  Now we add on an unelected committee of eager beavers to make "claytons" decisions our Parliament is to gutless to make.  Whoopee!
The Battler recommends this link as food for thought http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2010/07/23/2962335.htm

A committee! That's what we'll do.
One hundred & fifty of our brave and true
Who will have twelve months to find an answer,
To come to grips with that carbon cancer.

Naturally, they'll report and recommend
While we, in Parliament, consider, then send
Our response to be reviewed
By "experts", with expertise imbued!

The people, shocked, in horror cried
And the world did nothing, while nature died!

Election 2010 - Homelessness A Neglected Issue? Not Many - Too Few!

Although only in its early stages, our Federal election campaign does not appear to have made an issue of mental illness and homelessness.  Perhaps it is on the horizon, who knows?  One would hope so, for it is true that elections, generally, are magnets for the big ticket items, the wow factor, the sexy issue of the day.
Perhaps there is something, waiting in the shadows, to be announced down the track, by someone who cares.  Yet, there is no doubt that, in the eyes of some, this issue is one that doesn't attract votes.

A cry for help untended, a heartless act of folly!
The homeless and the helpless, hanging on by dubious thread,
The weary, wronged and beaten - defeated but not quite dead;
Those hidden by the system, to keep them out of view,
Their votes so unimportant, not many - too few!

And all their songs of melancholy
Waif-whisper, oh so pensive,
Slipping, quietly missed, by the oh so inattentive.
Wishing, waiting, wanting  - for notice, just on cue,
Alas, so unimportant, not many - too few!


Homelessness Australia
The Australian on Mental Health
AMA - Mental Health

Battler's Thought For The Day - BLOODRUST

Australia will shortly be going to a Federal election.  Like all elections, there will "mumbo jumbo", chest-thumping, polling, polling and more polling.........

Our politicians test the water
By reading another poll,
And set their plans for "moving forward"
By this method, rather droll.

Brain-stupor with power-lust!

Policies drift from birth to death
While boxes, ticked, define the slaughter.
Ah! The ebb and flow of a nation's fortunes...
"The margin's thin. Do you think we oughta!"

Intestinal atrophy - bloodrust!